Friday, May 8, 2009

On Some Outta Space S#!t, Like You Watch Star Trek... WOO-HAA!!!

When you're faced with the unsolvable problem of 43 years of labyrinthine continuity; 5 television series; countless novels, comic books, collateral and expanded universe lit; and a rabidly loyal fan base protecting a dead property... what do you do?!? What do you do?!? Well, in the case of Star Trek, you do exactly what JJ Abrams did, and pull a James Tiberius Kirk - you throw out the problem and rewrite the rules... and you do it in a way that everyone wins the un-winnable.

Bravo, Mr. Abrams. Bra-fucking-vo.

Without getting too much into the spoiler-y details of the plot (which gets better the more one thinks about it),
Star Trek indeed re-introduces us to the original crew of the Starship Enterprise, as all of the hype, news stories and commercials have promised it would for the past couple of years -- and it does so in a way that makes these characters accessible to the generations of the uninitiated that have sprung up and are just looking for a decent action flick, while retaining the characterizations, catchphrases and everything that fans of the original love about the 1966 series.

Most of the actors, especially Karl Urban (who as Leonard "Bones" McCoy is completely unrecognizable, if you only know him as Eomir from
Lord of the Rings) do it in a way that rises above an impression of the original performer; and some of the characters, like Uhura, are given so much more to do than their 1960's counterpart that they in fact are another person completely. Zachary Quinto is Spock, by the way. Besides his uncanny resemblance to young Leonard Nimoy, which must have had the septagenarian thinking he was actually having a trippy mirror flashback to the 1960s while he was on the set filming his supporting role as "Spock Prime" (their credit, not mine), Quinto owns the part by putting that quiet slow burn of emotion that fans of Heroes have known for 2.5 seasons to better use than its had in any of the last 20 or so episodes of that dying phenomenon.

The only actor in the mix that I feel bad for is Chris Pine, and its not because he didn't pull his weight. He was fantastic as this verison's Jim Kirk, but he's not Shatner. Unfortunately, a lot of people forget that Shatner wasn't "Shatner" either, at least not until he learned how to laugh at himself in the late 70s/early 80s. In fact, much like the Late Vegas Elvis, Shatner's Kirk wasn't even a good joke until all of the horrible impressions of him catapulted the character into infamy before enjoying what is now a lasting, good natured fame.
(I'm sure even affable Bill himself would admit that he was doing an impression of those impressions of himself, when he shouted the word "Khan!" into pop culture immortality circa 1982.) Pine, Abrams and writers Roberto Orci & Alex Kurtzman even manage to play with all of the fun bits of Shatner's Kirk that have been pointed out and dissected for decades, before letting this Kirk be the unreal, almost bland, action hero prototype that he's supposed to be - the one that he actually was when he swaggered across televisions from 1966-69 like any other cowboy sherriff on the boob tube.

FX and production values are as top notch as a summer actioner should be, and as I'm not an insanely die hard fan, I don't care that the movie's designers had the good sense to update everything a bit -- instead of slavishly adhering to the tech manuals and blueprints that have made book publishers an absolute mint over the years.

The movie's one weak point is the villain, who is more of a plot device than a character. Now, I don't know if it's because he's written that way or because he's played by Eric Bana, who actually managed to make The Hulk boring in 2003. As Nero, a renegade Romulan, he blandly declares his expiration date as the talented "It Boy" people heralded him as five or six years ago. I don't care who this guy was in Australia in the 1990s anymore, so I would appreciate it if critics, producers and directors would stop trying to sell me a faulty bill of goods on the man. He's made nothing but unimpressive crap for years now, and if he needs any more work, he should go back to Australia and try to fill the void that Hugh Jackman and Russell Crowe left by being good actors in American movies during roughly the same time frame that Bana "crossed over" too.

Bana's lack of anything in terms of acting or character barely detract from the overall film though, and in no way should that stop anyone who either casually enjoys Summer movies or is a die hard Trek nut from getting in those theaters and catching this great flick. Even Shatner can dig it, and not just because it completely leaves the door open for him coming back the franchise again... Whoops. I said it. But c'mon I was pretty good at staying away from the details thus far... I didn't even tell you how that's at all possible, which is really the reason to see this version of Star Trek.


Fun Fact: "Beam us up, Scotty" was never said on the original show. It entered the popular lexicon via Star Trek: The Animated Series. Also... I'm a complete nerd!

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